damn gorgeous

--
when she walked, her knees cracked like a pick-up truck driving full-force over a deer carcass.
~stupidvagina

Thank you very much.

This one should have been the DD.

...The icecream is just as cold, the glass
of beer bottles still shedding jade.

If you take out "is" (in keeping with parallel structure), it eliminates the awkward flow and gives justification to the passive voice.

I will also avoid my tendency to over-punctuate poetry (and respect your personal style) by suggesting only this:

you are there: the icecream just as cold, the glass
of beer bottles still shedding jade. But this could be

I also played around with:

you are there. The icecream is just as cold--the glass
of beer bottles still shedding jade. But this could be

My problem is less with "is" and more with the comma. That line is asking for a more dramatic pause, and the comma isn't doing it justice; however, I am also aware that dashes in poetry and too much punctuation are frowned upon in many circles, so I leave it entirely to your discretion (as it should be).

Honestly, those two lines are the only ones I have trouble with in this entire piece. I think it's lovely.

It made me feel.

beautiful. i admire your style. also love your taste in authors. +watch? peace.

--
Hustlers of the world : There is one Mark you cannot beat...the Mark inside.

This poem is amazing. Leaps and bounds ahead of everything I have read in some time. Great Job.

wowzers.

proposition:

what about leaving away the "is" here: This time it is no echo ? i think this would make for a better transition in regards to the following sentence also starting with "This time.

i liked this poem a lot .

--
the sky
to night's last city

The ending really gripped me; amazing job.

Perfect.

--
Life is a rough draft.

This is such a beautiful poem. I'm really impressed that the imagery was so rich, but the narrative structure was clear throughout and it just made a huge impact. I this poem a lot.
Your enjambment really sets the tone well, too. I normally try to include some constructive criticism when I read a really impressive poem like this to both show that I've though seriously about it and that I respect the author's dedication, but on this one I just have to say it's beautiful and I wouldn't change anything. There it is.